"I can see clearly now that the rain is gone." :)

Just kidding about the title...it's still POURING outside, but I'm happy none-the-less. :)

We're talking again. :) :) :) :) :) :) (Get the clue peolpe...I'm HAPPY!) Hehe.

So the story goes: he has been driving me to seminary Mon, Tues, and this morning. So Monday there was sillience in the car on the way to the church...it was the worst. And once we got in there we still both sat in our usual places, but our chairs were far apart. Then I wrote down on a piece of paper "Can you give me a ride to school?" and slid it his way. And for the first time he looked at me and he looked tired and sadly and nodded. So I wrote back "Thanks". And that's about the extent of our comunication on Monday.

But on Tuesday, when his dad dropped us off at school we were walking in the Warf building and he asked me where we were going to meet Jeff. So I told him idk, and asked him if it was alright if I went with them like always and he said yeah, so I was all like "I mean I could just stay here if you don't want me to go...I don't care either way." (which is something I always say when I really DO care...and he knows this, so he kind of looked at the ground and smiled.) So I said "What are we doing?" and he said "We're avoiding each other." and I said "I hate this, don't you?" and he said "Yeah, we're supposed to be friends."

So now we talk and laugh again like good old times. :) We hung out with Jeff Fredline and had a blast yesterday afternoon. And afterward I walked him to his next class. When we got to the door we both slowed down and I looked at him and was all like "Ummm, are we allowed to..." and he said "Hug?" and I said "Yeah? I mean what do you think?" and he said "Yes, we can hug. I mean - friends hug." And so we did.

Yup, it's lame and dorky but I missed us ACTUALLY being friends. Which we now are...again. *Smiles.*

Welcome to my drama...

Yup, as most of you already know...me and Jed aren't dating anymore. I told him on the way home from the dance on Saturday night that we are better off as friends. When we were friends, we actually TALKED which is something we don't really do anymore and we don't really hang out either. I just feel like the more I try to make things work, the more he pulls away. His mom has made it quite clear that she doesn't want us to spend time with each other and that was putting and unneeded amount of stress on the both of us. I went over to his house on Friday night to watch Chocolat and Pam had Anika and her friend Julie watch it with us to "chaperone". Needless to say...I was not in a very good mood when I got home. I guess that since I have cried almost every day since we got home from Texas, I knew that something needed to change. I just didn't expect things to be so hard. When I got home from the dance, I cried HYSTERICALLY for almost three hours. Yeah, I know...that's loads of tears. :( Thank goodness I have momma to try and make things okay. So Sunday morning Jed calls at about 11am and asks if we are going to need a ride to church. The Fredline's were planning to give us one, so I told him "no, but thanks anyway". And I was thinking "maybe he doesn't hate me afterall." Well.....I was worng.

When I got to church I sat in my normal spot on the third row where the Drapers sit (they weren't there yet, because momma had choir practice, so I was there early). Anywhos, Anika and her friend Julie sat to my left and there was the rest of the bench to my right. (that's where Jed sits...) So after the blessing and passing of the sacrament Jed goes and sits on the OTHER side beside his dad. The same for sunday school, he sat on one end of the room and I sat on the other. He wouldn't even look at me. Ugh, I hate this.

So, yup. That's about the story in the readers digest form.

Well that's it for now...hopefully by the time I get around to writing my next post things will be happier and less depressing. But I guess that I just have to take things one small step at a time and hope for the best.

My Weekend Get-A-Way.

 So I had a MAJOR melt down last night at Jed's house, then later with momma at our house. I mean oh my word, did I do LOADS of crying last night... Needless to say, momma and I both decided that a weekend getaway to Vivian's place in the good ole' Boro was JUST the solution to my problems.

This morning Vivian and David Ammon showed up at the house to pick me up. So what happened today: lunch at Taco Bell in Columbia, the play-place at the mall here in Murfresboro, Sam's Club to pick up some chicken for dinner, the making/eating of that AMAZING dinner, and.......Mason coming over to hang out with the big kids (David Ammon went to bed as soon as he came over)! It was SUPER fun. (For those of you who don't know who Mason is: he is the funniest 17 year old kid in the world. :) He goes to church in Vivian and Mark's ward.) Yup, he came over and we played ERS (I won :P ), kimps (me and Mason were on the winning team), and rummy (Mark won).  After that me, Mark and Mason all went to Kroger to pick up some junk food. Hehe, they were having a sale on Fuzes (the greatest juice drinks ever made)....soooooo I bought 20 of them. Oh, and we watched Confessions of a Shopaholic. It is a really cute movie that I had already seen, but hey, a girl NEEDS a good chic-flick every once in awhile. :)

Yeah, that's about it.....I'm REALLY tired, and David Ammon wakes up early. So I'm gonna hit the sack. Love Y'all! :)

Lyrics for the day:

"When autumn comes, it doesnt ask.
It just walks in, where it left you last.
And you never know, when it starts
Until there's fog inside the glass around your summer heart:

Something's missing
And I don't know how to fix it
something's missing
And I don't know what it is
At all

I can't be sure that this state of mind, is not of my own design
I wish there was an over the counter test, for loneliness.
For loneliness like this."

Soooo, Jed has been grounded since last Monday...his mom wanted him to plan FHE, he didn't want to....you get the clue. A.K.A. No phone, computer, i-pod, going anywhere, and most of all: NO me. UGHHHHH! I HATE this whole teenage "you're smart enough to get punished, but not responsible enough to have a real life" crap! I mean COME ON, we're freakin' in college and you want us to "ACT" like adults....so please start TREATING us like adults! Pam has slapped on TONS of new rules so now when I do get to hang out with him it is always turned into this big stressful deal of trash like "Anika (his little sister), can you ride with them?" Because one of the new rules is that Jed is not allowed to drive me home alone anymore...Which is SUPER lame, because this is our ONLY time to actually TALK with each other without being BOTHERED by anyone else. AND we park his car in front of our house with outside lights on. And everytime momma KNOWS exactly where we are the WHOLE time! I mean REALLY people, it's not like we are doing anything that could even be TURNED into something bad...at ALL! (Sorry for the ranting, but this is REALLY upsetting me!) Whatever, Hopefully they will un-ground him tonight. I missss my man. :(

Anyways, I'm sitting here in the Warf comp. lab. My next class is not until 2. Facebook is super boring. I'm almost done with Ender's Game. It's WAY better than I thought it would be. I actually ENJOY reading it. I went to school in my jammies today. I am super tired because I had this genius idea to take a nap as soon as I got home from church. So I fell asleep round 6:15-ish and woke up about 9:20-ish. Then I decided to crochet some. I ended up doing about one-third of a scarf. :) Hehe, so I didn't go back to bed until almost 2. Yup, I'm a lil' dumb. I already knew that.

Hmmmm, what else? Momma STILL doesn't have a car. Me and Jed are doing good, except for the fact that we hardly EVER get to spend time with each other. :( lameo.lameo.lameo. I ate Progresso chicken noodle soup for lunch. My tummy hurts like heck because I forgot that I had taken my meds OUT of my purse, hence the pain...I haven't taken my happy little purple pill today. Ummm, Wednesday night I'm going to Nashville to go to a free concert. Luke Bryan and Darius Rucker (the lead singer of Hootie and the Blowfish. And yes, Tori, he IS the one that Nate, momma and I saw last year), and some other people that I don't remember. It should be an AMAZING night/ Nashville adventure! :)

So, I have some time to kill.....

I have Algebra class today at 2, then Composition from 3:20-about 5. Yup, fun....I know! :) I just got back from Taco Bell. Me, Jed, and Jeff Fredline ran to the border to get away from this jail of a school. Hehe, just kiddin', but we did have a good time acting stupid at el bell de taco. Check THAT out for some proper Spanish skills. Ummmmmmmmmm, what else? I talked to Vivian earlier today on fb chat. It was coolio. Today is Thursday so I don't have school tomororow. And since Maury County schools are on fall break, I don't have seminary...a.k.a. I get to sleep past 5:20 am! YEAH...take THAT! :) Sorry, I'm SUPER pumped up. We had a bonfire/hayride last night for ym/yw and I had like 10 ewwwy gewwwwy yummmmmyyyy smoooooreeess! AND I ate a hotdog, chex-mix, and dranke like 2 sodas, too. Needless-to-say I was about to DIE this morning. But it was fun none-the-less. The hayride was freezing, I brought a jacket...but forgot it by the campfire.....soooooo, Jed put his arm around me and I ended up being more in HIS jacket than he was. :) But he didn't seem to mind. ;) hehe. kidding...again. Oh, the many joys of being a teenager and having an amazing boyfriend.
Not to get all gooey on y'all, but last night when I got home I talked to mom for like 20 mins. about how stinkin' cute my Jed-Darling is. Oh, and to crack y'all up some: when we were about to leave Brenna Brown's house last night, Charlie Plunket asked who was riding in what car back to the church and Brother Fredline (the ym president in our ward) was all like: "Well, I don't quite know yet, but it looks to me like Jed and his woman are going to be riding in my car."bahaha. Then Jed looked at me and was all like:"Jed and his woman...I like the sound of that!" :) Oh, what am I gonna do with him?! SUCH a teenage boy...yet sooooo adorable!
Anywhos, I miss-es my siss-es! I say that we ALL get together soon. We should meet in Las Vegas and have a girls of the Fisher/Fulton (ha Vivian, gotcha!) family getta-way. Is yous down wit it hommie? Sadly I'm kidding...again. But if we all could just pack up and leave everything, it SURE would make life easier.
I love y'all just the same and hope everything is going well. Hang in there ladies!
Love Always,
TheAMAZINGEmilyFisher
A.K.A. me :)