Ugh, soooo I just read Tori's blog and I missssss her. Vivian - you need to re-invite me to your blog because it's being gay and won't let me read it....
Anywhos, today I have class from 2-5 pm. I am sitting at the college waiting until 9:20 when Jed gets out of class, so we can go pick up some breakfast with Jeff Fredline (Amy's man). I have BUTT-LOADS of work to do before class....yet here I am venting because I have NO one else to vent to. Mom still doesn't have a car, so have been bumming rides pretty much from th Drapers. I hang out with Jed every day. We hung out Saturday with Paw-Paw and Vivian and Mark and David Ammon. It was pretty fun.
Ugh, I'm tired ALL of the time now. I still take my Melatonin, but I just CAN'T sleep. I don't know where I want to be next year - school wise. In a way I want to go to BYU, but a part of me just wants to stay here in my comfort zone. I have been without my depression meds for about three days...mom just picked them up last night, so hopefully I will start to feel better. I know it's lame...but I really just want to break down and cry. But I can't, because I am in a public library, and I will smear my make-up that took me forever this morning to do because my face looks like I was attacked my a mob of red markers. :( lame teenager-ness.
When it comes to Jed, everythings good. Amazing, actually. He has a way of making my crappy days better. Sounds dorky - I know - but it's true. We have a dance this Saturday night at our building. We have decided that we are going to be SUPER dorky and dance with each other almost EVERY slow dance. We sit together on Sundays and hold hands. We don't mind being together....but just about every youth boy (espically Blake) hates it. I know it shouldn't bother me....but it gets on my LAST nearves some times. But whatever, jerks will be jerks.
But thats about it.....I guess I'm just pms-ing, so don't think that my life sucks...because it really doesn't. I'm just going through a hard time right now. But "when you're at rock bottom, you can only go UP!". The words of wisdom that make me realize that no matter what trails I may be going through, Jesus went through it all. And I'm NEVER alone. Okay guys, Jed just walked in and I'm actually feeling LOADS better after writing this so I going to get off.
I love yous guys.
